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KEVIN MICHAEL GOODMAN FUNERAL SERVICES
May 27, 2005

Remarks by Bishop John R. Morris

Introduction

We are here to remember Kevin and his life. Those of you who are younger perhaps may find it odd, even hypocritical or “bogus,” that we emphasize the best of one’s life at his passing. Please don’t feel so. It is our way to call out the positive. Would you have us remember you any other way?

Kevin had all the energy and changeableness of any teenager. He gave service helping ward members moving or tending their yards, then videogame to all hours. Not a morning person, once wakened Kevin was a veritable nuclear reaction on a skateboard, generating enormous enthusiasm and energy. He could be perceptive beyond his years. He could also be exasperating at times, like so many teens. He made mostly good choices, and one tragic, poor choice.

A young man’s death is a death multiplied. It is a loss of possibilities, of promises, of hope for all that he was and could become. And death by one’s own hand is a difficult and overwhelming loss for parents, family and friends.

You may have feelings of disbelief. You may be overwhelmed, terrified, confused, hurt, upset or sorrowful. You may not know what to do with yourself. You may feel grief, guilt and even anger. You may even have come to question what you believe.

THE PLAN OF HAPPINESS

Where Kevin is now, you will someday be. You should understand some things about that place and of the plan of salvation—“the merciful plan of the great Creator” (2 Ne. 9:6), the Lord’s “great plan of happiness” (Alma 42:8)—things that Kevin, whose thoughts are no longer obscured by the veil or limited by his mortal body, clearly sees and would want you to know

First, we are spirit children of our Father in Heaven. We lived with him in our pre-mortal existence. We were all present at the first organization in heaven. We saw the Savior chosen and appointed and the plan of salvation made. TPJS, p. 158, 181

Second, life does not begin with birth, nor does it end with death. Mortal life is temporary and, measured against eternity, infinitesimally brief.

Third, we came here to be tested and proved, “to see if [we] will do all things whatsoever the Lord [our] God shall command.” Abr. 3:25

Fourth, “concerning the state of the soul between death and the resurrection … the spirits of all men, as soon as they are departed from this mortal body, yea, the spirits of all men … are taken home to that God who gave them life.” Alma 40:11 The world of spirits, or paradise, is structured and organized by families and levels to promote the Lord’s great work.

Fifth, after mortal death we will, without exception, rise in the Resurrection, restored to a perfect frame. See Alma 11:43-44, 40:23; D&C 138:17

“O how great the plan of our God! For on the other hand, the paradise of God must deliver up the spirits of the righteous, and the grave deliver up the body of the righteous; and the spirit and the body is restored to itself again, and all men become incorruptible, and immortal, and they are living souls, having a perfect knowledge… .” 2 Ne. 9:13

Sixth, after our resurrection, we will be judged and receive our reward.

“And it shall come to pass that when all men shall have passed from this first death unto life, … they must appear before the judgment-seat of the Holy One of Israel; and then cometh the judgment, and then must they be judged according to the holy judgment of God.” 2 Ne. 9:15

At that time, we will each know and acknowledge to the Savior the ultimate fairness of our individual test of mortality. We will each know and shout for joy and “call Him blessed” at the infinite and eternal fairness of his judgment, overwhelmed by his love and compassion and the grace he extends to us. See Mosiah 16:1

“And assuredly, … they who are righteous shall be righteous still …

“O the greatness and the justice of our God! …

“ … behold, the righteous, the saints of the Holy One of Israel, they who have believed in the Holy One of Israel, they who have endured the crosses of the world, and despised the shame of it, they shall inherit the kingdom of God, which was prepared for them from the foundation of the world, and their joy shall be full forever.” 2 Ne. 9:15-18

Whatever you think of your present lot, we were not sent here to fail.

“[We] each counseled intimately with God the Father. Freely, fully, and with a courage that astonishes mortal imagination, [we] elected and prepared for this estate. The contrasts of the flesh, its risks, its terrific trials, were known to [us]. More than that, [we] comprehended [our] actual appointed mission in this world, designed to meet [our] individual needs, and those who would depend upon [us]. Perhaps [we] anticipated these exact circumstances.” Truman G. Madsen, Eternal Man, p.57

“Ye cannot behold with your natural eyes, for the present time, the design of your God concerning those things which shall come hereafter, and the glory which shall follow after much tribulation.” D&C 58:3

All these things are and will be in accordance with the great plan of happiness.

TAKING ONE’S LIFE

You may struggle with the thought that the taking of a life, even one’s own, condemns the actor to a lesser reward and kingdom in the life to come.

The taking of one’s life by one’s own hand is wrong, and a very serious misuse of agency. Yet the Lord will not judge strictly by the act itself, but will look at Kevin’s circumstances and understanding and weigh the degree of his accountability. This is not to excuse, nor will the Lord excuse without more.

Only the Lord knows our thoughts, intents and abilities. See Alma 18:32; D&C 6:16, 33:1 He alone has all the facts. Only the Lord could administer fair judgment. And somehow He in his infinite wisdom will make all things right in due course.

“And it is requisite with the justice of God that men should be judged according to their works; and if their works were good in this life, and the desires of their hearts were good, that they should also, at the last day, be restored unto that which is good.” Alma 41:2-3

Death does not shield us from the consequences of our actions or the sorrow for sin necessary for repentance.

Kevin certainly knows how he came to be where he is now, and he also certainly knows what he must do there. We cannot say if his path will be harder there than here. Certainly Kevin may receive the Melchizedek Priesthood and his temple endowment vicariously.

“We cannot measure these particular spiritual experiences, of course. We do not know the extent to which the door is open for these particular people to grow and develop in righteousness until they possibly receive the blessings of exaltation. They committed a very serious sin, and some consequences of it may remain with them throughout eternity. Only our Father in Heaven knows the full answer to the questions our hearts ask regarding those who take their own lives.” M. Russell Ballard, “Suicide: Some Things We Know, and Some We Do Not,” Ensign, Oct. 1987, 6

“We need not doubt the wisdom and intelligence of the Great Jehovah; He will award judgment or mercy to all … according to their several deserts, … ; and when the designs of God shall be made manifest, and the curtain of futurity be withdrawn, we shall all of us eventually have to confess that the Judge of all the earth has done right.” TPJS, p. 218

When the Savior’s work is completed, there will be a place for Kevin.

The veil can be thin. Let us not burden Kevin by our self-doubt or weakness. He can yet learn from our faithfulness and example, and be strengthened by our resolve and our prayers. And he can comfort and minister to us as he progresses in the Spirit World, just as we can comfort him by our actions now and in the future.

Prayer and Blessing

1. It is all right to grieve, but do so with faith and understanding and trust.

Loving relationships continue beyond the doors of death and judgment. Family ties endure.

If sorrow at death can be felt only in proportion as we love in life, then we would not want to grieve less.

The only way to take sorrow out of death is to take love out of life.

2. May you be comforted.

One of the purposes of the Atonement is to take away our grief and heal our hearts. Give Him your grief and He will be with you and comfort you. Remember that the Atonement is even this minute reaching out to Kevin. Only the Lord knows Kevin’s heart. God is a generous and merciful God. He will give Kevin all that He can.

Have a personal knowledge of what is meant when the Lord said, “I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you.” John 14:18

How does anyone survive such sorrow as this without sustaining faith, without the Comforter?

3. May you have that “peace ... which passeth all understanding.” Phil. 4:7

I promise you that the peace which can only come from our Father will come to you, and that understanding and remembrances which can only come from our Father will also come to you.

In spite of our feeling, at times, that He has forgotten us, He testifies,

“Yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee …

“Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands.” 1 Ne. 21:15-16

4. I would that you have hope.

Look forward to your reunions with Kevin and loved ones, and associations with ancestors and descendants

“The expectation of seeing my friends in the morning of the resurrection cheers my soul and makes me bear up against the evils of life. It is like their taking a long journey, and on their return we meet them with increased joy” TPJS, p. 296

5. To those who now must move forward with life:

Let there be no judgment, no recriminations, no guilt, no doubts or crises of belief, no regrets or worries.

As hard as this time may be, remember the YAHOO principle—“You Always Have Other Options.”

I feel that Kevin would tell us now that the most important decision any of us can make is to stay the course, finish the race, endure to the end. Only the Lord knows when we have learned all we were sent here to learn and served all those He has sent us to serve. And our testing has many levels corresponding to transitions in our lives and even our deaths.

To those of us with a little more time to place our lives in order, to prepare for our reunion, grant an eternal perspective.

Grant strength and determination—physical, mental and spiritual. We honor those who left us only by living better and more faithfully in the years we have left.

Grant a stronger testimony of the doctrines of resurrection, the mediation of Christ and the certainty of life after death.

Our burden and joy is to so live that we may be worthy see our loved ones again.